Obligatory new year resolution here

You know the people who, after they've passed on, have left drawers of paper clips/bags/twist ties/etc. and everyone smiles about how they really couldn't part with anything? That's me. The grandmothers who refuse to use the "good" anything, who leave mugs/cups/clothes/jewellry completely unused for the next generation? That's me as well. What's my point? It stops today.

I have been blessed with a very generous circle of friends and family. As a result, I have stashes upon stashes of really great art and craft supplies. Why have I not used them? Well, that's a tough question, and one that I suppose a therapist might be better able to answer. I assume it's twofold: I am afraid that I will need it for something else later, and I am unsure of my own vision (what if it turns out to be garbage and I've wasted it?). In short - my self-esteem has not allowed me the freedom to use these wonderful gifts. That is unacceptable.

I was going to use a random photo of a pile of fabric to illustrate this post. Instead, this is my fabric closet. If I am going to be honest, I will start here.

Not exactly the biggest stash ever, but there is a lot of nice stuff hidden in there. My resolution? I am going to use my stashes. I am going to pull out the good stuff, the precious, the things that make me nervous, and I am going to use them. I am giving myself permission to use things to experiment, to play, and to grow. That makes me nervous; I think nervous mught be good.

Hmm - refocus...

Ok. I started with the best of intentions, I swear I did. To be honest, I don't even consider this a fail. I've learned some very valuable things about how I work this week. One, small, rushed thing every day is unsatifying for me. The way I work, it doesn't lend itself to this, I often have more than one thing in development and I like to have some time to consider what I am doing. A completion per day is just not good for me. I may go a week without one thing complete, then finish 5 in one day. So - new rules. At least one completion, blogged and photographed, per week. Sometimes it may be more, but no less. Flexible, yeah - I can do that.

A bit late but...

Worms! Day 2, part of a larger piece to be completed at a later date.

First day - complete

A fly! I'm not sure if it will be 365 bugs, or 365 embroidery, or what exactly - but for now, I am going to be happy that the first day is a success. :)

Studio Practice

I am not a great self-starter. Wait, no, I am a great self-starter - I'm a really bad self-finisher. (I am aware that it isn't a word, but it's my blog and I like it.) So, yeah, that means there are a gazillion (conservatively speaking) unfinished projects in my studio. Some got derailed by pets and/or kids, some just didn't got the way I wanted them to go, and some kind of scared me so I put them away. Mostly, it comes down to this: if I don't finish them, or make the decision to repurpose them in some way, no one else will. It is New Year's Day, and in years past I've often spent the day recouperating or continuing the celebration, as you would. This year is different. It's not about resolutions or the changing year, it's about taking control and living life out loud. We all have excuses, we all have valid reasons even, to not do the things that bring us joy. Sometimes we trade one joy for another, that's a hard one to sort out in your head! In the past couple of weeks, I've been noticing change - from the corner of my eye, around corners, lurking in shadows. Today I am calling it out. I've commited to making something for 365 days, something has to be accomplished every single day. Not my idea, lovelies, this person: Make Something 365 who has some really good ideas for people just like me.

Studio practice just doesn't come naturally to me, I have a million ideas and they don't get exercised (or exorcised). I truly admire people who can put their heads down and just go, I wish I had that tenacity. Will this actually change my practice? Lord, I hope so! Let's see where this year leads...

One down, one to go

This is the invitation for the most recent show, I was absolutely blessed to be asked to participate in this one. It really stretched my comfort zone and gave me chance to work on some new techniques that I needed a good push to do. The work has returned, and will be shown here next year. Although I don't have the time to devote to my work that I would like (24/7? Yes, please!) I am slowly figuring out how to keep on keeping on.

A show invitation, how exciting!

I received notice that a group show I'm involved with is a go. This is very exciting for me, it provides several different opportunities at once - not to mention the fact that it has jump-started my flagging creativity (thankfully!) Now - research, research, research...